Diversifying My Bookshelves


The Chicago Tribune tipped me off to this book. It allegedly contains the longest literary sentence. Sadly, the book was overlooked for an award for the longest literary sentence due to
  1. an obscene number of "blahs" that appear in the story
  2. it's literary value is highly questionable

There are more volumes, too. Eleven of them, in fact.

Because I care about you all and want to expand your reading horizons, I'll share an excerpt of The Blah Book, Volume 10:

Blah intimidated, they blah to blah blah, where blah and blah passed a blah blah. Blah little blah that blah blah one blah surprised to blah what blah their blah were blah.
‘I always blah a blah to blah a blah,’ he blah blah.
‘I like blah.’
‘You can’t be a babyoubiquitouseadogablahomeffectonightobyeassymmetri-cityowlablaheatenderopechoeslightlyuppiepitheturnsweetoastiedgedificexcre-tadamanterribleducatedrumustablahisisterealityearnobodyesirapacityounde-rstandoorbellicksensuousecretownevereadsimplelationatchomiciderectionabo-blahisuperediagramustoleratevenominalovenergyahoopsorryoudderunoxiou-slutablahuousetstrongamevermorenjoymentaboopensweetreasurevokexac-teamsterepackageseveninelevenockeauseartifactseldomorelapselectrocut-evilivesilentlyahublahementonightomorroweaponeverespondeblahidde-nebulaboutediousleeprisoneverafflesteadfastemptingearoamoblahalfres-hotoastereactsillyesidehilliftstupidadealtooptionaleagueatsausagearnestu-blahooderangesmallevelowolfishybridizationamingametiarismorianblahian-blahismeadowblahianicoachingenusexadecimaloopingpongabbereadyamoa-nuouseanchorismiraculousuityuppiemigrantubelationoblahistablebblahorr-endousuabilityesoupismediandumacaroonablahablegomanialtitudexchang-eablexcisionalismoblahuousementetragonicivilianacreousingoaltendereda-blahablescalatoracecardoorentopaquescapismoblahabilentrancingarbagele-ctricsoapboxysteraceastablahuousistementrashedoodahuddlembalmoistu-rearldomagnificationaffreakyesheatsundownothiseasonymphomiacellaret-eninelevenublahubbyellowindowoodwormerelyohobelizechoingoopersonic-kerabidivingrabbleconomyuckebablahismealoadstonephemeralabourecall-ementeacheroadielaborationationalinguisticsuasionobblelevatoreactionice-lyearbooknagrablahookvassensuousensuousensuouspringubbinsmalleftur-nibblescapadescapadechoscillationucleustackookudospellablahistablahicc-upingovernmentediouspiraleftakejaculationationalismoreffectivefferentru-ismajorityurtamponakedeadoorunsouthundredaysimultaneouslyalecauda-tecovereaffirmationopositelocutioniblickamikazedelweissporteenyellibera-lismoccasineaparallelabeliblahableuclideanuclearareditoreadsolemnubbin-slowomanizationaevustillicksevenoblahublahueagernessimpleagletruegov-ercomestabledacityachtingentlemanodsacredatabouterribleffigyeastablea-geroamiddleggymnasiumoblahismoderadiationodalasereedubbinamelesse-asonearlyearedemandsomeasyearsoperaticreamarmaladendayuckyesabr-eternalongoalifeveno-cksuddenablahitablahementalismatutinalipoisonom-inationowhereverywhereveneverunuchaleisurepidemiculturexp…

So, who's up for an ARC of the next volume? Show of hands, please.


11 comments:

  1. Yikes!

    What use is this to the world, I ask you? Who would spend their hard earned cash for that?

    I had a favorite book as a child, The Blah by Jack Kent. Much better use of "blah"! The only picture of the cover I could find is here. Don't know why they have that price on it, Amazon has them for $2! Anyway, cute book, I bet BK would like it! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahahaha!! where do u even get these kinda infos :D

    u made my day..blah! it is blah.. it is just tooo blahh...

    hil-blah-arious :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. OMG!!! My first reaction: thank god I wasn't asked to be the editor. My second reaction: What editor?????

    ReplyDelete
  4. For the love of blah - I could've written that book and been a gazillionaire. I'm still stunned that someone actually published this. My hopes of becoming a writer may really come true! Ha!

    -blah

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wait - did you seriously type all that? Now you're starting to scare me.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ROTFL @ Beth F.'s comment!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I would love to know how many copies were sold.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ummmm....

    *stabs self in eye and runs away*

    Andi

    ReplyDelete
  9. Carey - I like your "blah" book better! (Laughing at the $53 part).

    Veens - I think you have the formula down. Now you can writer your own.

    Beth - "what editor" is right. Self published. Imagine that.

    Amy - Copy & Paste. Are you crazy, bwahahaha?

    Kathy - my best guess? 2.

    Andi - now you're on my wavelength, ha.

    ReplyDelete
  10. What is the point of this? The author had to have some motive of writing this!

    This reminds me of how we called this one baby Mozart tape "blah" because there was this puppet dragon who randomly would come on and say "BLAH!"

    ReplyDelete

Fire away!